The Pleasure of a Porch

As soon as the weather hits double digits (Celsius), you’ll find me on my porch with my dog drinking coffee and soaking up that early spring sun. After being cooped up indoors all winter, it’s an experience that I look forward to every year. I always find the first hint of spring to be restorative. It’s a time where I can get excited about all of the events and projects that come with a new season.

Spring is relatively short in this part of the world but even so, it doesn’t take long for my porch to become a hubbub of activity. Already some of my plants are showing new growth and some of my neighbours are following my example and joining me for coffee when the weather is right (six feet apart, of course). It gets even busier during the summertime. My dog and I will spend many an afternoon gardening, sunbathing, writing, reading or merely relaxing. A whole day can go by without me leaving the porch; it usually starts with my morning coffee and ends with a glass of wine with friends.

This will be my eighth spring in this apartment and so far I’ve never been bored. (In fact, I love my porch so much I’ve written about my dreams and plans for it several years in a row: here, here and here.) I’m already anticipating the fun I will have this summer working on and enjoying my little green space in the city.

If you have a porch, balcony or other outdoor space I encourage you to take advantage of it as much as you can this spring and summer. It can be an opportunity to change your routine or environment (even if it means stepping outside for just a couple of minutes). For those of you who don’t have an outdoor space, even just taking a few plants and making your own green sanctuary indoors can do wonders for your well-being and mental health.

Whatever you decide to do this spring and summer, wherever you end up spending it, I hope you make the most of the season!

What are your plans for your outdoor space this year? Comment below or drop me a line at keepingbusyb@gmail.com and tell me all of your hopes and dreams for your outdoor space. Looking for inspiration? I’ve got tons of ideas over on Pinterest.

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways!

Ever been on a rope course? I have, once, when I was thirteen and it was one of the scariest things I had to do in my life. I’m pretty clumsy when it comes to most physical activities and I’m not so good with heights, either. So asking me to (repel) down a length of rope while strapped to a harness is kind of like asking me to stand on my head and hold my breath for as long as I can- not impossible, but most likely not going to happen.

But there I was anyway, somehow having been coerced up there and now I was faced with having to glide from one tree to another and I was freaking terrified. The pressure was on. Everyone was yelling at me, encouraging me. I almost started crying.

One of the teachers was already over on the other side. “You gotta keep on going or you’re going have to find another way to get down,” he called.

In that moment, something inside me shifted. I looked down and it was far. Like really far. And there was no way I was going to attempt the descent myself. I looked over at the teacher who had called out to me, at the length of rope suspended in the air before me. There was no way out except to do it, no matter how scared I felt about it.

And that’s kind of like a lot of things that we’re scared of in life: they’re inevitable and most of the time the only way through is forward, even if it means confronting the unknown, or taking a risk. We can kick or scream or cry in front of our classmates but our reaction changes nothing; the problem will always be there until we work through it.

I was faced with a choice: move forward or remained trapped on a tiny wooden platform forty feet in the air. Neither option appealed to me but being trapped up there seemed far more awful than zip-lining between two trees. One option would move me forward, the other would leave me stuck.

You can choose to let your fear take over until it brings you to a standstill, or you can acknowledge the fear for what it is- just an emotion- and continue on with your life. You may be surprised to find that things weren’t as bad as you anticipated.

As for me? I zip-lined down that rope and screamed the entire way. When I got to the other end, I was shaking but happy. I had just done something scary and survived. Nothing had changed except that I was one step closer to my destination and I was getting braver, so brave that I didn’t look down or back and instead found myself only facing forward.

In this day and age we place so many demands ourselves that sometimes even going about our day-to-day lives is exhausting. As a person who likes to keep busy, I find myself struggling to stay balanced. You can follow my journey here, or click here or here to find more ways to streamline your life to keep it simple.

What are some of the ways that you stay balanced? Give us your advice below, or email your strategies to keepingbusywithb@gmail.com.

That Time My Body Tried to Self-Destruct

I’ve put off writing this for over a year now. When I first started I felt it was necessary but then it became too difficult and I stopped because I figured no one would be interested . After some time passed I started to wonder if I had done the right thing. I wondered if anyone else had gone through what I had been through. I share this with you today in the hope that there’s someone out there who needs to read it as much is I need to write about it. Consider it a cautionary tale.

Last spring, my body decided to self-destruct. To a casual observer it may have seemed as if it were a long time coming but to me it was a total shock. I didn’t know what was happening to me.

How do I describe myself at that time other than to say I was a mess? I had stopped eating and sleeping and as a result of my stomach was upset all the time and I was exhausted to the point that I was falling asleep in random places. My skin broke out and I started losing my hair. I lost weight and had to go to the doctor, who told me to stop overworking myself.

But I didn’t listen. As my stress levels rose, my health plummeted: I started having frequent panic attacks and crying spells that would last hours. I felt like I couldn’t handle anything and it made me hate myself. I was angry all the time: I’d throw tantrums, I’d throw things and then I would throw myself down on the bed afterwards and wonder about the person that I was becoming.

The final straw occurred when I got sick, really sick, the kind of sick that makes you cancel everything and stay in bed for a week. It made me realize that I was miserable. I hated my life. I knew that if I kept I’m going the way I was I would make myself sicker and at the time the only way out that I could see was to do something drastic.

So I quit my job.

Disclaimer: don’t quit your job. It’s a really risky thing to do, especially when you’re in a bad place. However, it seemed like the only solution to me. I missed freelancing: working from home, getting creative. I wanted to be passionate about something again.

First, I took some time off because it had been seven years since I had had a vacation. I had to teach myself to enjoy once again the little things that used to give me pleasure: reading, journaling, creative writing. It sounds like a lot of fun but reality it wasn’t easy trying to shed the workaholic personality I had developed.

It’s something I’m still working on. I did eventually go back to freelancing (that’s a whole other post) but even then I have learned the importance of following my body’s cues. In doing so, I have to come to discover that if you’re not taking care of yourself on an emotional and physical level you will lose the strength needed to deal with things on a daily basis.

Now that I’m kinder to myself my stress levels have become more manageable. I have more energy and experience better health overall. Sure, I still have my moments/days/weeks but they are getting fewer and farther between.

If any of the above sounds familiar to you than my advice is this: listen to your body because it will tell you when you’ve had enough. It will tell you when it is depleted. It will tell you when the lifestyle you’re leading is wrong.

Deep down inside, you know which things are best for you. Recognize those things, honor those things and try not to let them go.

In this day and age we place so many demands ourselves that sometimes even going about our day-to-day lives is exhausting. As a person who likes to keep busy, I find myself struggling to stay balanced. You can follow my journey here, or click here or here to find more ways to streamline your life to keep it simple.

What are some of the ways that you stay balanced? Give us your advice below, or email your strategies to keepingbusywithb@gmail.com.

The Secret to Everyday Happiness

I recently celebrated a birthday and I’m not lying when I said I had a great day. I gave myself a day off of work and spent time with family and friends just relaxing and enjoying myself. It felt great.

If you’re a workaholic or perfectionist like me, you know how much work can suddenly start to take over your life. Taking even just one day off can give you a different perspective. I realized that most of my days are planned around work. My birthday gave me a rare opportunity to plan for pleasure instead.

I started to wonder about why I wasn’t making more room in my life for the things I love. Why would I save only one day out of the whole year for rest and relaxation? What if I could find some way for my day to be pleasurable every day, even in just some small way? Could I actually plan my own happiness?

If happiness is something that you work on, it’s a state of mind that needs to be worked on every day. Giving yourself something to look forward to, allowing yourself time to relax or even indulging in something small are all good ways of injecting some fun into the day, whether it’s during the week or on the weekend.

Realistically, there might not be an opportunity to do this on a daily basis (like I said, life gets in the way) but there is always the time to practice gratitude. It may sound corny, but reminding yourself of reasons to be happy can actually improve your mood. Gratitude doesn’t always have to mean listing the things you’re grateful for either- for me, practicing gratitude also encompasses finding appreciation or pleasure in the everyday world around me. It could be as simple as being grateful for the breeze on a hot summer day, or how beautiful the view is from your window. There are little sparks of joy everywhere in your life if you know where to look for them. If you don’t, it may be time to create some. (Check out The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo or The Book of Awesome by Neil Patrisha for some ideas.)

We only have birthdays once a year, but there’s no reason why we shouldn’t have reasons to celebrate everyday. We’re alive, for one thing, which is remarkable unto itself. If we constantly look for opportunities to be grateful for this, we can all be on our way to something that looks like everyday happiness.

In this day and age we place so many demands ourselves that sometimes even going about our day-to-day lives is exhausting. As a person who likes to keep busy, I find myself struggling to stay balanced. You can follow my journey here, or click here or here to find more ways to streamline your life to keep it simple.

What are some of the ways that you stay balanced? Give us your advice below, or email your strategies to keepingbusywithb@gmail.com.